I am officially a senior. God, my very first day of high school was not too long ago. I remember trying to find my Bio class and I just kept frantically running around the place. Then, I saw some sophomore (now a graduate, I think) also trying to find first period class. She asked me if I was nervous and I said yes. I was thinking, "No! You're not supposed to say yes or you'll look like the dumb freshman you are." She replied with a "Aww, don't be nervous." I never really asked for her name and I forgot what she looked like seconds after.
I went to graduation yesterday and I kept thinking, "I'm going to be there in a year." It's so weird. The seniors kept throwing the traditional beach balls as well as blow-up dolls and corn tortillas. Yes, corn tortillas. The speeches were quite cliché but props because I don't think I'd have the balls to get up and give a speech. They were long so I was relieved to hear that one girl recite her poem. Really, it was just like any other graduation I've attended. Afterwards, I tricked Christian and told him I had to tell him about someone we have talked about (because I know he's a sucker for that kind of thing) then egged him because he floured me on my birthday, haha.
Well, hooray for junior year finally being over. Junior year was just a bitch, really. I'll sum it up in different categories:
Academics: I came into junior year with a lot of motivation and vigor. I would always hear about how junior year was the hardest year of your high school career, so I was prepared to work. I had a good first semester and I would've had a better one if I didn't screw up my AP US History notebook. Eventually, my school performance declined. I felt like I had no reason to wake up and with all these honors/AP classes, I felt inferior compared to most of my classmates. I promised myself I would never let certain people or situations get to me or my academics but it happened again.
Guys: Every year in high school, I've had a boyfriend. I had one in freshman year, then in sophomore year. However, I did not have any boyfriends during my junior year. It was pretty hard for me because throughout the first half of the year, I still had feelings for my previous boyfriend and a big part of me was scared of being hurt again. We were not together for long time but I liked him a lot and ended up getting dumped (because he didn't have time for me; what's ironic is that I said something similar to the previous, previous boyfriend). Ah, I guess that's what you get in return for treating a nice guy (the previous, previous boyfriend) like shit. Because I was trying really hard to get over the past relationship, I began "falling" for random guys I wouldn't usually like. Then, some things happened with some guy I met at a party but I don't want to talk too much about it. Oh, and something I found interesting: I went to a party with my cousin and she told me a bunch of guys were asking about me but she was being overprotective and told them to bug off. Boooo. And most of the guys at that party were cute and Filipino ("cute" and "Filipino" in the same sentence?! Say it ain't so!). Anyways, where was I? Eventually, I got over the previous boyfriend and a new infatuation was born. I will not say much about him, but I will say this: He does not go to my school and is a grade below me. I find it funny that he's a grade below me because throughout the year, I've always been saying things like, "Oh, I want a mature, older guy who'll take care of me and blah blah blah" then I form an infatuation with someone a grade below me. It's not too bad, right? I don't really know him, but I'm working on that. Honestly, I want to achieve happiness within myself first before finding someone else that makes me happy.
Friends: Throughout the year, I mostly hung out with Luci and Christian. Oh, and sometimes Brenda when she wasn't busy (which was rarely). And of course, Stefen when he still was over at WHS. I'd say I had a pretty good time with them. However, towards the end of the year, I began to miss My Boo a lot. We started talking again through Myspace, and I was really glad that we were talking again. I missed being able to act however or say/do whatever I wanted. I know I could do that now, but it's just not the same with other friends. Like, I just can't have a serious conversation with Christian. Ever. And conversations with certain friends are just way too school-centered. With her, we could have off-the-wall conversations or emotional ones. It's just not the same feeling with the friends I hang out with at school.
Tennis: I liked our team this year (in general). Our season was pretty much drama-free compared to the last one. But the Fresno trip wasn't as fun as the year before. We finally beat Monterey, haha. Hmm, I had fun playing doubles with Lissette and I won some doubles award thing with her, but I guess Tony is going to pair up Julia and me next season. Yeah, didn't make it to CCS, but Luci and Karina did so that is good. We have a better chance at getting the league title next season. Yeah, I know our league is probably easy as shit (except for Monterey) but whatever.
Other things: The WHS vs. PV game! Talk about a movie ending. Juan decided to be awesome again and join us. There were about only 30 seconds left, and we were down one point. PV punted the ball and Joey Ponzio catches it at the 35-yard line. He just kept running towards the end zone and we kept yelling "RUN! RUN! RUN!" and as soon as he made that touchdown, we blew our blow horn like a motherfucker and started screaming our lungs out. The away side fell silent. On our side, everyone, including myself, was jumping and screaming and knowing how old our bleachers are, you'd think they'd fall off. I'm usually scared of the bleachers, but I was so full of excitement that I didn't give a shit if I fell through those big-ass gaps. We waited for the clock to end, then stormed the fields. I will NEVER forget that game. I haven't been to a lot of high school football games, but that game has to be the best one I've ever witnessed. We didn't get an actual trophy (a big-ass coffee cup, whatever) and we didn't win a lot of games, but we won the one game that mattered. Hm, what else happened this year? Rallies were wack, except for the homecoming one. Some stupid shit (gang fights and whatnot) went down afterwards but before that, it was pretty fun. I miss having rallies at the old gym. Dances...the only ones I went to were the homecoming dance (which consisted of lots of banda and that kind of music) and prom. Prom was fun though. I really wished some of the friends I hang out with could've gone because I knew they would've had fun. But there's always next year, yes?
God, I write way too fucking much. Took the SAT Subject Tests today (US History and Math 2...what the FUCK was I thinking?) and saw Philip and Michael. It's been a while. I didn't even recognize Philip at first. When we took our break, he said hi to me, and I said, "Oh wow, I didn't even recognize you!" loudly and some old lady told me to be quiet. Okay, whatever. It's probably the same bitchy lady that monitored the SAT Reasoning Test last time I took it. It's so insane though. I haven't seen some of these kids in the longest time and we talk about people I went to school with and whatnot. Afterwards, Luci and I got some food at The Bean and I went over to her place. Her brother was having a graduation party. I couldn't stay longer because I had to attend some other graduation party. Tomorrow, I have another graduation party to attend. My dad tells me to attend all these parties because I'm graduating next year and they'll probably throw me some Filipino party too. God, I'm graduating next year. Time needs to slow the fuck down.
I made a playlist I've been listening to non-stop. It's basically a bunch of songs I'd listen to during the summer that I can chill to. So far, it has 30 songs and I'm planning to add to my collection as time goes by. Here's my playlist so far (not in any particular order):
Let me just say that I adore M.I.A.'s style. She pulls off things most people can't. It's crazy.
